Thursday, May 03, 2012

Why is it that all sales guys speak with a southern accent? Is it that potential buyers realize that such an accept means that sales person is nearly retarded and thinks they can pull one over on them? I don't know. I had the pleasure of drinking next to some catholic asshole salesman who sold insurance. I was at a bar, drinking my pitcher of beer, no glasses, when this man in a pink shirt starts talking shit about everything. I'm thinking to myself "Say something about me, Nick. Give me a reason." and he starts talking to the drunk fatty about how the Yankees are America's team and the Brewers are terrible. "Say that the Red Wings are great." He tells the drunk fatty about how he likes my style for drinking a straight pitcher, compared to his bud light lime and how he loves Jameson, which is how I know he's catholic, Jameson is catholic swill whisky(no e because it sucks). I want to lay this man out, not only because he's a sales man, not only because he's a man in a pink shirt(Homer Simpson was put in a mental institution for such an offense), not only because he drinks bitch ass whisky, but also because he speaks with a southern accent and sells insurance and talks shit about my home team. I couldn't give a shit about basesball, but talk shit about the underdogs and talk up the bourgeois team from out east and you can kiss my ass after I've eaten three black bean burgers. You don't want any part of my ass after three black bean burgers, trust me.

said Tommy T. at 9:52 PM - #

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