Tuesday, October 25, 2011


I put that song there because, when we talk, I don't know what to do with my hands and you don't know where to look, so you look at my hands.

I need to say Hanna's not a bitch. I paint her in a bad light here. But she's still the most important person to me ever and I'm still very much in love with her, even though I shouldn't be, no matter what I say. She's still my favorite. She came to pick up the last of her stuff and I had about a million things I wanted to say to her, about zero of which I actually said. I figured she had gotten a job back home and had to pick up her last remnants so she could leave for good and never have to see me again. I'm thinking she's going to leave without telling me goodbye, which would devastate me. She told me she was nervous about this all day. Well, I was too. I still worry that her friends laugh at how much of a dumbass I am whenever they hang out.

I was hoping we could sit down and talk, but it didn't happen, so now I watch the Degrassi Halloween special alone. I wanted to hang out so she could find out that Adam was the one that got shot. I wanted to let her know that this whole busting my ass at the gym is for her and I don't care one bit if I don't have to, or shouldn't, do it. I'm hoping she doesn't get mad at the cd I put at the end of the photo album she picked up. It's not my best work, just a goodbye for now(I hope) type of thing. Maybe I shouldn't type that so, when her children flip through it and ask who that damn handsome guy who looks like the happiest person ever with her is, she'll find it.

I forgot to give her her nutella.

said Tommy T. at 5:02 PM - #

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