Monday, September 29, 2008

I’ve been in Ottawa less than four hours, but I can tell you straight away I love this city already. Five minutes after checking in to my hotel, I was dressed in garb that I figured would make me look least like a tourist(a Winnipeg Jets jersey), and in search of poutine or Tim Horton’s to quench my hunger. I don’t get as far as the elevator down to the ground floor and there’s a group of old people who just won’t quit using the word “out”, saying it in the way only Canadians can..

After walking around for a half hour or so, passing on Pizza Pizza, who I’ll hit up later this week because they advertise on both Canadian hockey teams rink boards and on the Degrassi television show. I’m almost positive it’s nothing more than a glorified Pizza Hut or Little Ceasar’s, but I’ve got to find out for sure. While on my search for poutine, I realized the citizens of this town are proud of their British heritage after finding many English pubs. I also managed to walk by the embassy of Iraq and the embassy of the republic of Hungary. I guess it should be expected that these things would be around, considering this is the capital of the country, but I wasn’t prepared to find that kind of thing in passing.

Poutine is just as delicious as I had expected French fries topped with cheese curds topped with gravy would be, which is to say it’s fucking great, and goes particularly well with beer. Because I’m in a place that’s not Wisconsin, I’m not drinking any Miller products, focusing mainly on local brews if at all possible because one needs to think locally, fuck globally. I do, however, have some beefs with locals. First, there’s no hockey on my television. I understand that no Canadian teams are playing this night, but my Canadian five dollar bill with kids playing hockey pictured on it seems to tell me these people love their hockey. The fact that the first bar I walked into had me talking with the barkeep for five minutes about the Jets and how he never disliked that team further drove home that these people like hockey. So why is White Sox baseball or Monday Night Football on the tele? Second, I probably could have done without the $30 cab ride, even Sajneej did drive like a fucking maniac damn near hitting pedestrians and switching lanes more often than my brother. Third, a big fuck you goes out to my hotel, the Lord Elgin, who charges $150 a night but still feels the need to charge $10 a day for internet access, which is even more highway robbery than the $6.95 a day American Airlines charges for their wireless internet. They can jump right up my butt if they think I’ll pay that kind of price, I’ll save my twonies for after I order a donut and some coffee tomorrow morning at Tim Horton’s at which time I’ll post this.

said Tommy T. at 7:34 PM - #

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